


to be young and lost

by van_sunshine



Category: Original Work
Genre: Anxiety, F/M, First time doing this, High School, How Do I Tag, I Don't Even Know, Music, Orchestra, School, chamber orchestra, friendships, its hard, junior - Freeform, prob won't be long, trying to make friends
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-05
Updated: 2018-12-05
Packaged: 2019-09-07 15:40:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16856740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/van_sunshine/pseuds/van_sunshine
Summary: Luna is starting her junior year of high school, taking a music class of all things. She doesn't know anyone here and took a chance in search of any talent she might possess. Along the way she meets a boy which complicates her plan for herself. Stumble with Luna through dumb teenage hormones, and search with her for her hidden talent.





	to be young and lost

It was Luna’s first time signing up for a class all alone. She begged and begged her friends to join with her but alas, none of them were interested in it. It was a long commitment to take on her own, the class is twice as long as regular classes, taking up an entire year rather than one semester. Luna decided that its high school, she’s entering her junior year and won’t be the prey of the upperclassmen any longer. She is now an upperclassman. Crazy how that one year between sophomore and junior year matters so much. None the less she’s about to enter the class. Luna wasn’t confident walking in. Never being creatively talented, and she decides to take a music class. Classic Luna. Maybe this was a bad idea, she felt a solid rock settling in her belly. 

Luna has issues with personal space and anxiety when entering new uncharted areas. She creeps across the room to sit near the back and at the edge of the rows of seats. The classroom was already making her uncomfortable. There were no desks and only chairs. She needs air to breathe and space to do it in. The teacher was already in the room chatting with some students. Luna quickly realizes that they must have had the teacher before and they seem to have a very casual and easy relationship with the teacher. 

What was the teacher’s name again? Luna rummages through her backpack for her schedule. She hates feeling like a freshman, never knowing what’s going on or what to do or how to even act in new situations. Mrs. Howard. She says the name five more times, while looking at the teacher to memorize it. 

Okay. Now that that’s settled, she had five minutes before class even begun. Luna usually puts on a persona that best suits the environment she’s in. For example, in a class where she needs a lot of help in, she reads the teacher and finds out what is best for her. If the teacher thinks themselves of superior intelligence, she heavily lays on her frustration and helplessness. If the teacher wants a conscious effort from the student and won’t help unless the student is willing to help themselves, then she would adopt that mentality and succeed in that class again. With people who aren’t teachers it’s a little more complicated. Maybe her classmate needs someone to laugh at their comments said under their breath. Maybe the group project she’s in needs a strong leader. Maybe someone is complaining and needs someone to point out the positive or in the opposite case, someone to agree with them how bad they have it. In order for Luna to pick out the proper persona, she first needs to observe. Observing others makes her feel anxious. There are so many different people in a room and how does she know who to approach and what to say. Normally she waits to be approached and hopes to have observed them long enough to know how to act with them. 

She has been sitting in this classroom and doesn’t know how to present herself. Should she be the typical teenager, her face attached to the screen of her phone. She sees nothing wrong with being on her phone but hates how others see it and forces to use their perspective when deciding on what to do. Should she maybe instead take out her book and be seen like an absolute nerd. Should she sit there quietly and huddle in on herself to seem helpless, shy and innocent. Should she try taking up as much space as possible and put her earphones in while pretending to sleep. 

Luna opted for the scared, shy and innocent look. It was close enough to how she was already feeling. Back to being a scared rabbit, easily mistaken for a freshman. Again. The teacher had finally started class and Luna began taking in the students that were chatting with Mrs. Howard before class began. They seem like they were her age. It was a group of three. Two boys and one girl. One of the boys had definitely caught her eye. With dark curly hair, in the style of an undercut, deep blue eyes, and a lanky build, Luna was gone. You can count on Luna to get a crush within 2 seconds of seeing someone. She was already mentally kicking herself. She can’t afford to be awkward and dumb in a yearlong class, especially when she wasn’t dumb at all, but maybe a little awkward in a good way. She would have forgotten how to speak to normal human beings the moment she tried to talk to him. But that was all boys in general. They’re all so weird and different than girls. Being unattracted to whoever she was speaking to made it easier. Good thing she wasn’t sitting anywhere near him because she was definitely attracted. 

By the end of class, she found out his name was Elliott and he plays the cello. She also found out that she was in a room with very expensive instruments and that she was to learn how to play one of them. Leave it up to inexperience to make her anxious again. She was to play the viola, which she held for a few minutes while the teacher snapped a picture of them all. Viola. Luna has never heard of it before. It looked like a violin. She was to play it like a violin, yet it was bigger, and the strings weren’t the same. There were only three other people playing it. She was part of a small group of inexperienced students while the rest have been playing their instruments for at least a year. 

The next day came without incident and she found herself in the class once more. Today was a day where the teacher would explain the rules of the class and expectations and etc. Luna decided that she can half pay attention. Her eyes kept on darting to the front of the room, where Elliott sat. He was intimidating, and she hated herself for feeling that way. Ultimately, she hated being in a place where others had more experience than her and were more comfortable in the same surroundings she was in. Elliott and his group of friends easily banter with Mrs. Howard, throwing in jokes, essentially keeping the energy of the class fun and silly. Luna was jealous of the easy care free attitude and being able to be that way with a teacher was something she never imagined being possible. Outgoing people were intimidating to her. Outgoing people who knew what they were doing, had close friends next to them, and who were extremely talented intimidated her. Elliott was one of these people. Luna’s attention was snapped back to what the teacher was saying as Mrs. Howard announced that we were going to go around the class and do a couple icebreakers. Great.

Luna has actually met with the teacher in the previous semester because she was hesitant about joining. After the meeting she was excited and ready to take the class. During the icebreakers, the teacher took role and asked everyone what grade they were in. Luna was right, Elliott and his friends were I the same grade as herself. When Mrs. Howard got to Luna, her face lit up.

“You’re Luna! I remember you, and I’m so glad you decided to join my class.”

As she sat there listening to her, Luna’s palms began to sweat. She was focusing the entirety of the class’ attention on Luna for a much longer period than was strictly required. All Luna could do was sit there and nod. Until Mrs. Howard continued with,

“Class this is Luna and she is a freshman. You’re a freshman, right?”

Luna sat there with the shock and embarrassment of being called a freshman. Technically it wasn’t a big deal. This means that the persona she was putting out there actually worked. But it being high school, meant that everyone hated being a freshman. Luna quickly corrected the teacher,

“Oh, haha, no I’m actually a junior.”

“Silly me. I’m sorry Luna, okay moving on, who is next….”

By this time Luna already zoned out of whatever the teacher was saying once again.

The next week came and went and they had finally begun learning how to play. Luna thanked her lucky stars that she wasn’t learning cello. That would have required learning from Elliot, who happened to be first chair (the best cello player/ leader of the cellos). Every section had a first chair. The first violins, second violins, violas, cellos, and double bass. Luna was learning from Jacob and was able to successfully form coherent sentences.

As the semester progressed, an entire month has passed. Luna had learned that the violas sat in the middle of the orchestra, which did nothing to help with her space issues. Thankfully the less experienced folk sat further away from the front, so she sat in the third row, the last row. The viola apparently played the least important parts. Middle voices for the middle parts, complete with awkward rhythms and terrible projection, they were the least understood and almost never heard. By the end of the month Luna had finally made a friend.

**Author's Note:**

> helloooo!! so to whoever took a chance to read this, I just wanted to say thank you. Leave a comment of literally anything so that I know I'm not alone out here. This is an original story and hope you enjoy it.


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